FEELINGS

Story contd.

Author’s note: MTL is JAMIE (MTL) - with the proviso that at this stage in the story Pat does not know that he is her true love.

Travelling to Oxbridge gave me time to think. Was I in love with Andrew? At age eighteen how can you tell? He wasn’t what I had imagined; he was happy go lucky, carefree, not totally reliable – phone calls never came on time (I was anal about appointments) and he lacked a certain gravitas. But I loved being with him and thought about him a great deal. Then there was the physical thing. I can only liken it to when you first lie in the sun after a cold bleak winter. As the sun’s rays hit your skin your body sort of gulps and burgeons with sensual pleasure and makes you (well me) want to sing the Hallelujah Chorus. He was ardent but thoughtful enough to check he wasn’t going too far.

On the other hand up until two months ago Jamie (MTL) was my knight in shining armour – but I hadn’t seen him for a year thanks to Paul – Maddie’s husband. He had persuaded Dad that going to the Commem Ball with Jamie would set me on the primrose path. Maybe I should avoid taking Jamie to Maddie’s house. Jamie was not just a rock climber but a real mountaineer. I used to fantasise that I would never marry anyone until I had climbed with them, when all would become clear – hands as steady as rocks etc.

By the time we reached Oxbridge I was still in a muddle but determined to enjoy the hard earned holiday. Jamie had said he wouldn’t meet me at the station as there would be a reception committee. Actually there was just Gran who was looking after Maddie and we took a taxi to the Girl’s Friendly Society and went to the Cadena for tea then bused to Maddie’s to meet my baby nephew who sucked my cheek and was adorable.

Later when I met Jamie he was just as I had remembered him and he walked me to the GFS. It seemed there had been a mix-up – there was no bed for me and I would have to sleep on a mattress on the floor in a room with three other girls. Needless to say – at that age this was ‘great fun’ and we chatted and had a midnight feast. Next morning one of the girls was leaving so I joined her for a farewell meringue glace and then met Jamie for coffee. We walked by the river and he showed me the college barge. When I turned up at Maddie’s in the afternoon – to my astonishment – Paul told me to ask Jamie round for coffee. Had he remembered that Jamie’s brother Liam was an old boyfriend of Maddie’s? When they did meet – after the initial sparring – they seemed to get on like a house on fire.

It turned out to be the most sociable and enjoyable week ever with the girls at the GFS – meeting Maddie’s friends and a day in London with Gran when we saw all the sights and she showed me London air-port. After her flights to the States to see Auntie Janet she felt she owned it and we giggled when the waiter, at lunch said it was ‘a perfect day for a flight modom.’

As Maddie said ‘Jamie is really pushing the boat out and we saw ‘The Drunkard’ and a splendid production of ‘The White Horse Inn’, the film ‘Scott of the Antarctic’ and had a hilarious lunch and tea at the digs of an undergrad friend. Saw Jamie’s digs which were excellent (my photo was on the mantelpiece) and his landlord said all nurses were bricks. Jamie asked for a dispassionate kiss as I would give the family. One night in his digs he spilt cider on my white blouse but I managed to sponge it off without any impropriety. There were many long walks by the river and it became increasingly difficult to get back to the GFS by 10.30 – locking up time.

Everybody liked Jamie and Gran invited him up north. We had spent a lot of time together – he was a really sweet boy/man – three years older than me and I was no nearer solving the dilemma.