And Another Thing…


‘If sex is such a natural phenomenon how come there are so many books on how to do it.’
Bette Midler


‘Life ‘wrote a friend of mine ‘is a public performance on the violin, in which you must learn the instrument as you go along.’
E M Forster


‘It’s hard for me to get used to these changing times I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty.’
George Burns


‘I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog that growls every morning, a parrot that swears all afternoon, and a cat that comes home late at night.’
Marie Corelli


‘By all means marry. If you get a good wife you’ll be happy; if you get a bad one you’ll become a philosopher.’
Socrates


‘Children need love, especially when they do not deserve it’
Harold Shubert


‘Happiness is having a large, loving , caring, close-knit family in another city.’
George Burns.


‘Parents are not interested in justice, they’re interested in quiet.’
Bill Cosby


‘Cats are smarter than dogs. You can’t get eight cats to pull a sled through snow.’
Jeff Valdez


‘I don’t know whether nice people tend to grow roses or growing roses makes nice people.’
Roland A Browne


Advance Banter: the QI Book of Quotations by John Lloyd& John Mitchinson