BETRAYAL

Early one morning,
Just as the sun was rising,
I heard a maid sing in the valley below:
‘Oh, don’t deceive me;
Oh, never leave me!
How could you use a poor maiden so?’
Anon

I was in town, shopping with Maddie when she suddenly said,

‘See that blonde over there?’

I looked and saw an attractive woman with bleached hair.

‘Yes! What about her?’

‘She looks like the woman Jamie’s been seeing.’

When I had got over the shock I begged Maddie to tell me all she knew. She was probably regretting having said anything but gradually she gave me snippets of information so I could piece them together and get some sort of understanding.
He had met her sometime in the summer. She was a sexy older woman, married with a young child. She fell hook, line and sinker for Jamie. She knew about me and was aware of when he came up to see me. She was a very determined woman and made up her mind she was going to have Jamie and left her husband and child to pursue him.

For his part Jamie was twenty two, very vulnerable as far as sex was concerned and aware that it would be at least a couple of years before we could be married. He was in debt and I earned peanuts. I don’t think he stood a cat in hells chance to resist such a temptation. The odd friend who had met me remonstrated with him but whether Maddie and Paul did I have no idea. They obviously knew – hence the odd hints they dropped which had unnerved me. At one time they had jokingly suggested I ask Jamie why he would never play the trumpet again. He was living a double life, drinking too much through stress and had got into a fight which resulted in a broken tooth.

It puzzled me that they took it so lightly. As far as Maddie was concerned I was just her kid sister – not to be taken seriously and I hadn’t told anyone of Jamies’s proposal and my acceptance.

It took me a while to absorb all this information and slowly I began to get angry. I was angry with this woman for deliberately setting out to seduce Jamie when she knew he had a girlfriend; I was angry with Jamie for being weak and allowing me to think it was all my fault and I was angry with myself for being such a stupid , deluded, virginal idiot.

The anger was cleansing and eradicated the self-pity and despair. I thought of the strength of Mum and Gran. No man was going to ruin my life. I had been happy before and I would be happy again – eventually. I decide to remove all thoughts of Jamie from my conscious mind and attempt never to take anyone or anything for granted again. Meanwhile I was going to get on with my life – finish my training and plan the future. My immediate problem was what to do with my fortnight’s holiday.

Our set had by now halved with nurses leaving, unable to withstand the stresses and strains of hospital life. Ginny had met a boy and was getting very serious so she wasn’t available for a holiday trip but lately I had been working with Kate another member of our set. She was a really good person without being pi and I found her comforting to be with. She told me about Plas: a Christian Fellowship House in Wales nestled in the mountains. There were outdoor activities and she warned me – prayers morning and evening. She showed me a snap of it and when she invited me to join her in February I jumped at the chance. Snowdon here I come!

Below: - Plas and Kate